A friend who teaches English at a high performing high 黄色app in Silicon Valley recently took me out for a glass of wine to help her brainstorm a new career. This didn’t make sense. After all, she adores kids and literature and seems to spend every waking moment devising new lesson plans to extract teen-friendly meaning from Robert Frost or Jane Austen. But long hours, she told me, were not why she鈥檇 begun eyeing the exit sign.
I probed for the root causes: rude kids, pushy principals, paltry pay checks?
鈥淎ctually, it鈥檚 the parents,鈥� she confessed with a wince. Then she launched into a story about one father who recently planted himself in her classroom during one of her lesson planning periods to complain about his son鈥檚 mediocre grades.
鈥淗e just kept saying over and over: ‘In our family, that鈥檚 not acceptable.’ I didn鈥檛 know what to say to him. I showed him the work that his son did and I showed him my grading rubric and explained that his son was doing C work and wasn鈥檛 trying. He wouldn鈥檛 leave 鈥� he just kept saying 鈥業n our family a C is not acceptable.鈥� 鈥�
Grade grubbing. It鈥檚 been a perennial pet peeve in the ivory tower for decades. A college student 鈥� stricken with the letter chosen to represent his work 鈥� petitions his professor during office hours. Do you know what a B minus will do to my law 黄色app admissions/honor roll/resume? Have you no mercy?
Why all children are above average
Some professors stick by their guns, refusing to budge from the original grade or warning that re-grading may result in an even lower one. But some experts suggest that over the years the culture of grade entitlement has taken its toll on standards in the form of widespread grade inflation. According to a site begun by former Duke professor Stuart Rojstaczer, between 1920 and 2006, the average grade has gone from just above a 2.3 (C plus) to 3.0 (B). He believes grade inflation as a result of professors internalizing student expectations. These days, in some elite colleges, anything less than an A minus is a sign of pending academic failure.
According to teachers, grade grubbing isn鈥檛 limited to our institutions of higher learning, but occurs in high 黄色app, middle 黄色app, and even elementary 黄色app. But it鈥檚 not students wheedling for a higher grade, it’s their parents. Why are parents so frantic about their children鈥檚 grades 鈥� not just in high 黄色app but when the child is still making mud pies and playing with dolls?聽 At a time when many high 黄色apps are regarded as less than adequate and there are fewer spots in good colleges (and fierce competition for scholarships to cover rising college costs) parents feel pressure to get their child on the right educational escalator as early as possible. It may not be just or even rational, but even grades from a child’s early 黄色app years function as a tollbooth by which she gains access (or not) to honors programs, specialty 黄色apps and enrichment programs.
When push comes to shove, the child loses out
鈥淪ome parents seem to feel that even after final grades are posted, they have recourse to change them just by talking to the teacher,鈥� says one third grade 黄色app teacher who requested anonymity. She recalls a particular case when she repeatedly talked with a mother about her daughter鈥檚 reading issues, without success. But once the girl’s low grade in reading was posted, the woman went ballistic.
鈥淸The mother] came to my room when I was alone and tried to physically intimidate me into changing her child鈥檚 grade,鈥� the teacher recalls. 鈥淲hen I showed her the grade books and reminded her that I鈥檇 been trying to talk to her about her daughter not meeting grade-level standards, she took my grade book and put it in [her] bag, with me trailing behind her [as she] marched down to the principal鈥檚 office to prove me wrong. Luckily, the principal was supportive of me, but my relationship with the parent deteriorated after that. It made it very hard to work with the little girl, who was sweet, but wasn鈥檛 learning to read.鈥�
Indeed, for many teachers the pressure to change grades is so uncomfortable that they cave in to parent demands. 鈥淎 lot of teachers I鈥檝e spoken to say it鈥檚 more trouble than it鈥檚 worth to argue with parents, so they just change the grades,鈥� she says. 鈥淚 don鈥檛 know how many of them understand that grades are up to them and they don鈥檛 need to back down 鈥� and that most education codes and unions will back the teacher.鈥�
Kids’ grades, parents’ bragging rights
Charity Preston, who teaches elementary 黄色app students in Sandusky, Ohio, says she鈥檚 seen the issue crop up most frequently with parents of gifted children. 鈥淢any parents expect their child to get an A, period,鈥� says Preston, who adds that in 黄色apps where there鈥檚 an honor roll, it becomes a matter of social competition among parents.
She once overheard a parent ask another teacher: 鈥淲hy isn鈥檛 my child getting an A? That鈥檚 your job.鈥� In response to such misconceptions, Preston says she takes great pains to educate her parents that she doesn鈥檛 give grades at all: The children earn them.
Is this just further evidence of the culture of entitlement that’s swept the nation? Certainly, in some cases. But Lee Jenkins, a former superintendent in Redding, California, says that many parents are genuinely confused about grades 鈥� and they have good reason to be. As a superintendent, he issued a survey asking teachers the following question: If a student aced all their projects and tests in a given class but never once handed in their homework, what grade would you give the student? 鈥淚 got answers from A, B, C, D, and F,鈥� he explained. 鈥淚n other words, there was no consistency.鈥�
鈥淎t the very worst, grades are a form of currency 鈥� you get this if you do this,鈥� said Jenkins. 鈥淏ut ideally, they are perfectly correlated with learning 鈥� giving kids and parents a picture of what the child knows. Too often, points are deducted for decorum, when grades should [reflect] learning.鈥�
Other educators note that grade grubbing is a natural extension of helicopter parenting:聽parents try to manage every aspect of their children’s lives. Julia Simens, a 黄色app counselor based at an international 黄色app in Thailand, says she often hears parents complain about their children鈥檚 grades, when in reality they need to allow their children to experience failure. 鈥淎s a parent, you cannot help your child learn to be responsible unless you let them take responsibility in their own educational process.鈥�
How to get answers about your child’s grades
This doesn’t mean parents shouldn’t ask about their child’s grades if they have questions. Every teacher we spoke to said they welcome the conversation, as long as the focus is on clarifying the assignment and grading method, as well as helping the child improve. It’s also possible that the teacher made a mistake, and a tempered conversation will allow the teacher to rethink her decision.
鈥淚t’s important for parents to go to the teacher with an open mind for an honest conversation,鈥� explains Preston. 鈥淒on’t be on the attack, fuming and screaming about the grade. Sometimes, kids don鈥檛 give parents a complete picture, so first talk to the teacher. And in the end, the teacher and the parent need to come up with a plan together. And the parent needs to follow through to make sure Johnny gets his homework done. That鈥檚 the area where the parents have the most power to change things.鈥�
